I learned of the untimely death of Dr. George Tiller through twitter, courtesy of Wendy Norris, editor of the Colorado Independent, who was re-reporting information from Ron Sylvester, a court journalist with the Wichita Eagle. I fought down the urge to immediately come to my keyboard and make a statement, opting instead to wait and truly get my thoughts in order.
I am alive today because of a doctor who was willing to perform a late-term abortion. Without that doctor, and his support staff, I would have died, right along with the child I carried. Because there were distinct and irrefutable medical problems associated with my pregnancy, some label my experiences as "exceptional," and dismiss them. But because I've been on that other side, I realize two things:
1) My experience really isn't that exceptional. Unfortunately, families throughout the world grapple with decisions such as the one I made, often while having their medical options roadblocked by laws.
2) That government has no place in the making of medical decisions.
There is already a lot of back-slapping and congratulatory mumblings from those who cling to the "pro-life" title even while finding relief in the murder of a so-called "baby killer." (And the only one I'm linking to is from an Iowan who makes mild on this point.) What is missing from all of this, it seems, are the voices of women like myself: Women in situations that can only be resolved in one of a handful of horrific options. Although many of us just want to forget, to keep our medical decisions private and move on with our lives, we must also think about the women (our daughters and granddaughters) who will be the ones to live with the reality of our silence.
Until we are ready to tell our stories, no one will truly have the opportunity for private medical decisions. Until we are ready to tell our stories, the national conversation will continue to be driven by misinformation and political and religious rhetoric.
Updated to add this reminder: The nation's second oldest abortion fund is the Iowa Medical Aid Fund. Donations made to this fund are used to help women in need of abortion pay for medical expenses. If you are looking for something immediate you can do in Dr. Tiller's memory, please consider making a donation.
I am alive today because of a doctor who was willing to perform a late-term abortion. Without that doctor, and his support staff, I would have died, right along with the child I carried. Because there were distinct and irrefutable medical problems associated with my pregnancy, some label my experiences as "exceptional," and dismiss them. But because I've been on that other side, I realize two things:
1) My experience really isn't that exceptional. Unfortunately, families throughout the world grapple with decisions such as the one I made, often while having their medical options roadblocked by laws.
2) That government has no place in the making of medical decisions.
There is already a lot of back-slapping and congratulatory mumblings from those who cling to the "pro-life" title even while finding relief in the murder of a so-called "baby killer." (And the only one I'm linking to is from an Iowan who makes mild on this point.) What is missing from all of this, it seems, are the voices of women like myself: Women in situations that can only be resolved in one of a handful of horrific options. Although many of us just want to forget, to keep our medical decisions private and move on with our lives, we must also think about the women (our daughters and granddaughters) who will be the ones to live with the reality of our silence.
Until we are ready to tell our stories, no one will truly have the opportunity for private medical decisions. Until we are ready to tell our stories, the national conversation will continue to be driven by misinformation and political and religious rhetoric.
Updated to add this reminder: The nation's second oldest abortion fund is the Iowa Medical Aid Fund. Donations made to this fund are used to help women in need of abortion pay for medical expenses. If you are looking for something immediate you can do in Dr. Tiller's memory, please consider making a donation.
Lynda, my thoughts exactly. I wrote about it too today. So many are responsible for this. All those who rant and rave and call doctors murderers and their staff and patients. They all bear responsibility for inciting the mentally unstable one who does their dirty work for them. It's terribly sad.
Just a sincere question - why did you have to have your baby aborted instead of delivered normally and allow it to have a slight chance of living?
A sincere question deserves a sincere answer...
In my particular case, the anencephaly was the worst of the neural tube defects, but not the only one. Without getting too graphic, in addition to the anencephaly, there was severe spina bifida (the spine did not close) and there were additional abnormalities in the formation of the abdomen. An excess of amniotic fluid, which I was told was likely due to a heart defect, caused additional stress.
There was no hope that this pregnancy could result in a live birth, even if I attempted to carry to term. There were also other issues that impacted what happened, but those came after the decision had been made to end the pregnancy.
These are very personal and intensely emotional decisions -- heart-wrenching to make, and nearly impossible to imagine. I know other women who have faced similar horrific choices and come to a different decision. We all weighed what was before us and did what we thought was best at that moment in time.
Lynda, It must take an incredible amount of strength to discuss this in public. This was your child that died. I can't imagine the heartache this caused. I admire your courage.
Kathy